Time to enjoy Paradise

I had another intense day. Bipolar and Tourettes and Akira Kurosawa's film 'Ikiru' (To Live). I cried all morning and felt numb for the rest of the day. I guess I most enjoy the 'media' section of the conference. I feel a little guilty about getting credit for going to films, but whereas I feel restless at most lectures and seminars, and find it difficult to stay for any length of time, I have no trouble staying at the edge of my seat for the two to two and a half hours of a good movie. I guess I should forget psychiatry and just watch films.

Lorraine Bracco was interviewed about her experience with depression and her treatment with Zoloft. I thought she was amazing as Dr. Melfi on the Sopranos, but I had no idea she had been depressed and in treatment too.

I rushed to get back to my hotel room and change into my bathing suit for the last rays of sun. The beach is in shadow by 5, so I think I got thirty minutes, which is more than enough. I felt lonely and missed my family and resolved to try to get home earlier. I had talked to Maya and Eric earlier in the day and both sounded fine, and clearly doing just fine without me, but I wanted them to be with me on the beach. I took my long beach walk as the sun set, and the further left I walked the more sun I got. My hotel is only a few stories high and is dwarfed by huge skyscrapers all around it, which put it in shadow part of the day.

There was music and dancing at Kuhio Beach, but the singing was shockingly awful, so I found it impossible to stay. I wandered in the opposite direction where the sun was setting, and took my time getting back to my hotel room.

I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to get through to the airline to change my ticket. Unfortunately it turned out that I flew out on United and return on Continental and although the two airlines have merged, trying to change through United is not possible. I stayed on the line for 25 minutes with Continental before I gave up and accepted that it is unlikely that I can return home earlier without paying far too much extra.

I will try to enjoy my time here in paradise for another couple of days and not miss Eric and Maya and Tara too much.